Showing posts with label acne. Show all posts
Showing posts with label acne. Show all posts

Monday, November 19, 2012

Thanksgiving Friendly Outfits

Thanksgiving Friendly Outfits

Thanksgiving Friendly Outfits by elbonner featuring knit sweaters

Thanksgiving and gluttony go hand-in-hand which means your cute new jeans and horizontally-striped sweater might feel like a clingy, cotton-blended prison once all that rich food has been stuffed in your gob.  The answer to the age old question"what outfit can I get away with that's as comfortable as pajamas, but better looking than a prison jumpsuit?". The answer are structured leggings, flowy tops, and chunky sweaters. ALL of these things are on trend and always look chic if paired correctly. Just remember, the rule is if you're wearing just plain stretchy leggings, your top needs to go over your butt/crutch or else you will look like you've forgotten to wear pants. With structured leggings (ones that look like real pants) you can get away with basically wearing stretch pants and still looking good. Structured leggings are called that because they have details that make them more than just stretchy pants: zippers, paneling, rivets, and even prints can keep you from looking like an uncoordinated ballet teacher and the outfits above show how leggings can look holiday appropriate. So go ahead, have another slice of pie, you've got the room!

L-R
Acne sweater, River Island panel leggings, Frye boots
Equipment shirt, H&M leggings, Topshop boots
Rag & Bone sweater, Seven For All Mankind jeggings, Isabel Marant boots

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

My "It's Never Gonna Happen" Christmas List!

"It's Never Gonna Happen" Christmas Wishlist

"It's Never Gonna Happen" Christmas Wishlist by elbonner featuring studded boots

Like an unwanted display in Walgreens right after the 4th of July, I am debuting my incredibly unrealistic Christmas wishlist at the appropriate time of "it's not even Halloween yet, Emily!". This way if a sad billionaire sees it and take pity on me it might be my most successful Christmas haul since the last time my parents thought I deserved Christmas presents! Now, this is in no way supposed to make anyone feel poor or beneath me because I there is now way in hell I can afford these things, I just like them enough to want them in my closet without goings as far as brushing my teeth on paid webcams for weirdos.

Ance- Pistol Boots $570. You knew they'd be on here, and since Target has failed me in providing $30 replicas, they are still on my list.

LnA-Ipanema V-Neck $105. $100+ for a white t-shirt? Sure, if it spits money and does my taxes.

Comme Des Garcons- Plaid Scarf $515. Because it's not Christmas until you have a scarf that costs as much as half a years worth of health insurance.

Acne- Singer Knit Sweater $260. It's big, it's grey, its brand name reminds me of horribly blemished middle school pictures! 

Chanel- Perfection Lumiere Foundation $55. For that amount of money I could just get a black-market face lift and sketchy laser peel, i.e. being blinded with a laser pointer behind a Big Lots and then harvested for kidneys. 

3.1 Phillip Lim Pashli Satchel $895. In my defense, this is probably the cheapest bag I've ever really coveted. Hey, it could be a $64,000 Hermes! PS- It matches the SCARF people!

Ash-Titan Short Stud Biker Boots $491. Since I've recently started watching Sons of Anarchy, it's only appropriate to start dressing aggressively so no one can see the pain I feel knowing I'll never be cool enough to be in a biker gang. Bikers don't exfoliate, they don't like 60s French ye-ye pop, and above all they DO NOT cry during that part in Wall-E where he doesn't recognize Eve (soulless monsters!)

And last, but not least, if there art out a God up in heaven, smiling down upon his greatest creation. May he bestow upon her a 2013 Audi A5 in monsoon metallic grey with velvet beige leather interior. For I have no traffic infractions as of yet and would look really cool within it. 

 
Merry Not-That-Close-To-Christmas everyone!

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Sweaters A'Plenty

Sweaters A'Plenty

Sweaters A'Plenty by elbonner featuring knit tops

Of course the day after I post my ode to Dolce & Gabbana's Fall/Winter collection, out comes the racist earring debacle of 2012. My stance on the earrings: why even go there D&G? Just let earrings be rocks and metal that hang from your earlobes. Leave the human visage out of it! I decided to buffer yesterdays post with today's way less racist post of fall sweaters! It has to be super cold for me to wear sweaters because I overheat like a Geo Storm in Phoenix, but that doesn't keep me from loving them! I usually find myself wearing boat neck, striped sweaters like the first one, but I'm really liking all these texturized chunky knits that look fashionable yet they allow you to eat as much pumpkin bread as you can handle. Of course I love my neons and brights and J.Crew is great for that sort of thing. I'm getting more into asymmetrical hemlines too. Don't go boring, go crazy!

Collette by Collette Dinnigan Sweater 
J. Crew Fair Isle Sweater
Acne Strindberg Pullover  
J. Crew Tippi Sweater
H&M Sweater in Neon Yellow
AllSaints Wasson Pullover

Monday, September 17, 2012

Rainbow Scarves

Rainbow Scarves

Rainbow Scarves by elbonner featuring square scarves

I Love scarves. They can make a really boring outfit looks really effortlessly put together instead of "I spent absolutely no time on this".  Since scarves nowadays come in every color of the rainbow, it was only appropriate for me to make a rainbow scarf picture! It's not quite cold enough to bust one out, but soon I will finally be able to cover my neck wrinkles without making me hot and giving me back sweat!

Saturday, September 8, 2012

What I Would Wear to NY Fashion Week...If It Was Cold

NY Fashion Week



Etro beaded top / H&M super skinny jeans, $32 / Acne leather boots / Proenza Schouler satchel handbag, $1,945 / Kenneth Jay Lane gold jewelry, $68

New York Fashion Week couldn't come at an unsexier time of the year. It's still hot here on the east coast and everyone is just sick of the heat and how it ruins anything where you have to be in a crowd of hot sweaty people. You're caught between seasons which really throws a wrench into your outfit creating because you don't know which season to go for. Should you prolong that summertime feeling and look like you're going to Coachella in last seasons clothes (barf!), or go for it and risk Visible Butt Sweat in fall clothing while schmoozing with the fashion elite (I bet Anne Wintour hates people with VBS). I'm at the point in my wardrobe where I'm just ready for fall to get here already. I've poked holes in all of my thin summer shirts, I've gotten weird stains on all of my shorts, my flip-flops and sandals all have dirty feet outlines in them; it's time for new stuff. 

I think they should push NY Fashion Week back a few weeks. Just have it in October! We're all ready for new stuff and nothing makes someone who's life revolves around keeping up with the trends life suck more than wearing your summer deodorant-stained $150 t-shirt at a show reminding you you're already behind the times! So this outfit is a bit early in it's makeup, but would be great if they had Fashion Week at a reasonable time... LIKE OCTOBER!

Friday, September 7, 2012

A Lover Letter to Acne Boots

I want you like a Snickers bar at fat camp. You're more beautiful than a twenty dollar bill a crack addict found in a pair of pants he just stole from a laundromat. Swaddle yourself around my giant man-feet and find out what real love is, Acne boots. Why do you have to be like $500? Why does this keep happening?!